So it's been a little over the week that normally goes by in between my obligatory blog posts, but I have a decent excuse:
EASTER!
Well, and the exhaustive daily events leading up to this joyous celebration.
My family and I had a beautiful Easter, and I pray that you did, as well. We attended an awesome Easter service at our church home, Oak Ridge Baptist, where we were blessed with an inspiring abundance of visitors, tons of people getting baptized, and many first-time decisions for Christ. It was a humbling experience, a day full of celebration.
We continued the good times at my mother's house, where she prepared a delicious meal for my family. Kaliah got to dye eggs with my brother's girlfriend's kids, and it was really cool that after being the only child in the family for so long, she finally had somebody else to play with. (Rashieme enjoyed it too. An epic game of freeze tag may or may not have went down, in which I discovered I'm quite possibly NOT the fastest person in the family, in spite all of the miles I try to cram into each month).
So the holiday was about our Savior and time together as a family. Mommom offered to take Kaliah for a few days, so Shieme and I can get some grown-up time in. I'm hoping we'll get a chance to do a little wedding planning and a lot of relaxing. I'm also going to have to squeeze in several errands of a boring nature, so I feel very blessed to have off this entire week from work.
But I know you guys don't stop on over just to hear the mundane details of my routine. You're looking for funny. So try this on for size:
'Twas the night before Easter, and I was freaking exhausted.
I'd just worked a shift at the Cottage. It wasn't even really busy, but I'm not getting any younger, and it HAD been super slammed the night before, which I had also worked. I got home just a little after Kaliah's bedtime, so since she woke as I entered the house, I had to run in and give her a quick kiss and a belated Bible story. I headed back into the living room and collapsed onto our recliner, with the intention of waiting for her to venture off into total slumber before I began filling her Easter basket. I even went so far as to ask Rashieme where the basket was, as earlier that day Kaliah had tried to fill it with dirt and leaves to create a nest for a robin's egg I found for her-- that's another story that ultimately ended in tragedy, so we'll save that one for another day). He located the basket for me, and I promptly fell asleep in the chair, drooling and protesting that I was still awake as Rashieme tried to force me off to bed.
So naturally, I totally forgot to play the Easter Bunny.
I forgot until Kaliah was standing over me Easter morning, demanding, "Where's the candy?"
"Umm... the Easter Bunny must be running late," I muttered, kicking myself for having dropped the ball.
"I think you're the Easter Bunny," Kaliah responded.
"No, no. You don't believe in the Easter Bunny, you don't get candy," I warned her. "I'm sure he's just running late. Go take a bath! Maybe he didn't come because you're too dirty."
"What? That's--"
"Go take a bath!"
So as she reluctantly headed off to the tub, I went racing outside in my robe and sneakers, hauling in the crap I'd bought and not brought in the night before, jamming Easter grass and jelly beans and chocolate eggs and rabbits haphazardly in the Easter basket, just managing to fling the last of the packaging materials into the garbage as Kaliah emerged from what has GOT to be the world's quickest bath.
"Why do you have Easter grass in your hands?"
"The Easter bunny left a mess! Look, he came and went while you were in the bath tub. How about that?"
If she hadn't quite stopped believing, I'm pretty sure that yesterday I effectively ended any remaining confidence she held in the Easter bunny's existence... but hey, what mattered to her the most was the candy. I was immediately forgiven for any crimes I may or may not have committed as she dug into her goods. Soon, it was time for the next battle:
The wearing of the Easter Dress.
And such are the holidays, and such is life: a series of battles, big and small, a journey of mistakes and apologies, mountain peeks and valley lows. Smiles and laughter, tears of joy and sorrow. Thanks, dear readers, for checking in. May you never forget to play the Easter Bunny, and may the peace of the Savior comfort you, no matter what your highs or lows may be in this supremely special existence.
Happy Easter!
Showing posts with label 2014. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 2014. Show all posts
Monday, April 21, 2014
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Some Kaliahisms to Get You Over the Hump...
Well, Hump Day is upon us, as are several inches of snow here in Slower Lower Delaware. Again.
I have no flip or humorous comments to offer concerning the weather. I have decided, though, that Old Man Winter is much more to blame for this than is Mother Nature. Men are much more stubborn, and this is The Winter That Never Ends, apparently.
So, what to do when you are snowed in for the four BILLIONTH time with your child or your children?
Treasure them for the joy that they are, of course.
It's either that, or, you know, allow them to slowly but surely drive you insane.
Just kidding.
Mostly.
I am blessed to have an amazing daughter. Still, sometimes the things that come out of her innocent mouth are quite ridiculous. So on a snowy spring day with not much else to do, I present, for your entertainment:
Kaliahisms.
Actual sayings by our eight-going-on-nine-year-old daughter, Kaliah.
1. My favorite so far this year: "It only takes one person to mind the business." I can't remember the exact context of this quote, but she said it shortly after New Year's and Rashieme and I bring it up frequently. And true: if the whole world had Kaliah's attitude, how much more peaceful would planet Earth be?
2. While cooking breakfast for Rashieme: "These are going to be the best eggs Dad's ever tasted. Except for the ones he makes. They're way better." Hash tag, Chef Problems. At least we tried.
3. After Kaliah finally admitted to forgetting about a cup of apple juice that the cat consequently knocked over:
Me: "All you had to do was say, I'm sorry, Mom. I forgot."
Rashieme: "Yeah. Instead of making a bunch of excuses." Looks my way. (Guilty as charged,
by the way and FYI). "Wonder who she gets that from?"
Kaliah: "From you, Dad. You just gave an excuse."
Rashieme: "No, I didn't. Kaliah, do you even know what an excuse is? Or are you just talking?"
Me: "Wonder who she gets that from."
4. "That dumb cat is so smart!"
5. Accompanied by the picture below and followed by evil laughter: "This is the perfect snowball. It's glorious!"
I have no flip or humorous comments to offer concerning the weather. I have decided, though, that Old Man Winter is much more to blame for this than is Mother Nature. Men are much more stubborn, and this is The Winter That Never Ends, apparently.
So, what to do when you are snowed in for the four BILLIONTH time with your child or your children?
Treasure them for the joy that they are, of course.
It's either that, or, you know, allow them to slowly but surely drive you insane.
Just kidding.
Mostly.
I am blessed to have an amazing daughter. Still, sometimes the things that come out of her innocent mouth are quite ridiculous. So on a snowy spring day with not much else to do, I present, for your entertainment:
Kaliahisms.
Actual sayings by our eight-going-on-nine-year-old daughter, Kaliah.
1. My favorite so far this year: "It only takes one person to mind the business." I can't remember the exact context of this quote, but she said it shortly after New Year's and Rashieme and I bring it up frequently. And true: if the whole world had Kaliah's attitude, how much more peaceful would planet Earth be?
2. While cooking breakfast for Rashieme: "These are going to be the best eggs Dad's ever tasted. Except for the ones he makes. They're way better." Hash tag, Chef Problems. At least we tried.
3. After Kaliah finally admitted to forgetting about a cup of apple juice that the cat consequently knocked over:
Me: "All you had to do was say, I'm sorry, Mom. I forgot."
Rashieme: "Yeah. Instead of making a bunch of excuses." Looks my way. (Guilty as charged,
by the way and FYI). "Wonder who she gets that from?"
Kaliah: "From you, Dad. You just gave an excuse."
Rashieme: "No, I didn't. Kaliah, do you even know what an excuse is? Or are you just talking?"
Me: "Wonder who she gets that from."
4. "That dumb cat is so smart!"
5. Accompanied by the picture below and followed by evil laughter: "This is the perfect snowball. It's glorious!"
Happy Hump Day, Er'rybody! Don't worry, warmer days are coming! (Aren't they? I mean, like, don't they have to be?)
Monday, March 17, 2014
I'm Dreaming of a White St. Patrick's Day...
Said no one ever.
And yet, that's exactly what we've got.
Poor Mother Nature. She's really been getting beat up on Facebook these past couple days. I've seen posts ranging from "Go Home, Mother Nature, You're Drunk," to "DIE WINTER DIE," to various other comments critiquing the Bi-Polar episodes the weather has been suffering from lately.
And I get it, I do. They've already added thirty minutes on to every school day (which is sort of hilarious, because on the day of the scheduled implementation of extra time, school was ironically closed due to-- you guessed it-- inclement weather). At this rate, summer vacation will begin for teachers at about the time we're ready to come back in August.
But, still. How often, on St. Patrick's Day, do you get a chance to make one of these:
She looks bigger than she actually is. (My mother decided she was a she. I didn't really think about it, just assumed it was a guy. I supposed that's sort of sexist of me, but hey, so is the term "Snowman." And since she is wearing my hat--with sparkly glitter threads woven throughout, nonetheless-- I guess she is a girl. Or a snowman who is very comfortable with his sexuality).
Still, even though she's small, I'm pretty proud of her. Granted, it has snowed approximately four million times so far this year, so much so that Kaliah asked me today if Delaware looks completely white from outer space. But none of the previous snowstorms brought the good-for-packing snow. I was beginning to think the problem was me, that I just wasn't talented enough to make the snow stick together. I thought maybe I'd reached a new low in life, because, really... how hard should it be to make snow form a few snowballs?
But then this most recent snow arrived, and I could tell the difference as soon as Kaliah and I started rolling it. It wasn't me, after all. This snow, this was the sticky kind. So behold: The St. Patty's Day Snow Woman.
We'll call her Pat.
Mother Nature does get a bad rep when she goes on these wild mood swings. (Funny how we assume snowmen are dudes but nature is a lady). I guess she's entitled, though. If I were responsible for the whole entire world's weather, it would be even more sporadic and crazy and unpredictable than it's been, even throughout this wacky winter. And I wouldn't apologize for it, either.
After all, it's a big world out there. There's a lot to keep up with.
And as for making up her mind and sticking to it?
Who are we to judge? I can't tell you the number of decisions I'm juggling with right now, but I bet you've got just as many. From the mundane, like deciding what to fix for dinner or what kind of damage control my hair is in need of, to the life changing--like is my career going where I want it to?
It's a miracle my child and I make it out the door fully clothed each morning, with all the stuff I'm thinking about.
I've been told I wear my heart on my sleeve, that I care too deeply and feel too much.
I know, of course, that this is true. But my feelings are what make me who I am. I don't always take criticism or rejection well (fun times on the publishing endeavors, let me tell you!), and I tend to overreact in all kinds of situations--to get too excited or take something too much to heart. To dwell on something I've done wrong or to overanalyze the tiniest details. But this same sensitivity makes me a better mother, a better listener, a better friend. I'd like to hope a better writer.
And my child, my colleagues, and my friends know that the volcanic emotional eruption comes with the territory. They know when to get out of the way and give me my space, or when I just need a hug.
So give nature a break. Sure, she can't make up her mind lately. She's been a bit moody--furious storms, smiling suns, gentle breezes, and God forbid--more snow--she's going through something, maybe, but who among us isn't?
You can't get the rainbows without the rain.
And you CAN make a snow woman on St. Patrick's Day!!
So while I'm not Irish, I do consider myself lucky. More than lucky, actually--blessed. I pray that all of you are blessed as well, and that if, much like Mother Nature, you're struggling to make up your mind about something--that you accept each day for what it's worth--another incredible day in your journey. No matter how far you are from your destination, you are somewhere today. And that's worth celebrating.
Just ask Pat. I doubt she thought she'd be here in March, but here she is.
And that, my friends, is something more than even the luck of the Irish.
And yet, that's exactly what we've got.
Poor Mother Nature. She's really been getting beat up on Facebook these past couple days. I've seen posts ranging from "Go Home, Mother Nature, You're Drunk," to "DIE WINTER DIE," to various other comments critiquing the Bi-Polar episodes the weather has been suffering from lately.
And I get it, I do. They've already added thirty minutes on to every school day (which is sort of hilarious, because on the day of the scheduled implementation of extra time, school was ironically closed due to-- you guessed it-- inclement weather). At this rate, summer vacation will begin for teachers at about the time we're ready to come back in August.
But, still. How often, on St. Patrick's Day, do you get a chance to make one of these:
She looks bigger than she actually is. (My mother decided she was a she. I didn't really think about it, just assumed it was a guy. I supposed that's sort of sexist of me, but hey, so is the term "Snowman." And since she is wearing my hat--with sparkly glitter threads woven throughout, nonetheless-- I guess she is a girl. Or a snowman who is very comfortable with his sexuality).
Still, even though she's small, I'm pretty proud of her. Granted, it has snowed approximately four million times so far this year, so much so that Kaliah asked me today if Delaware looks completely white from outer space. But none of the previous snowstorms brought the good-for-packing snow. I was beginning to think the problem was me, that I just wasn't talented enough to make the snow stick together. I thought maybe I'd reached a new low in life, because, really... how hard should it be to make snow form a few snowballs?
But then this most recent snow arrived, and I could tell the difference as soon as Kaliah and I started rolling it. It wasn't me, after all. This snow, this was the sticky kind. So behold: The St. Patty's Day Snow Woman.
We'll call her Pat.
Mother Nature does get a bad rep when she goes on these wild mood swings. (Funny how we assume snowmen are dudes but nature is a lady). I guess she's entitled, though. If I were responsible for the whole entire world's weather, it would be even more sporadic and crazy and unpredictable than it's been, even throughout this wacky winter. And I wouldn't apologize for it, either.
After all, it's a big world out there. There's a lot to keep up with.
And as for making up her mind and sticking to it?
Who are we to judge? I can't tell you the number of decisions I'm juggling with right now, but I bet you've got just as many. From the mundane, like deciding what to fix for dinner or what kind of damage control my hair is in need of, to the life changing--like is my career going where I want it to?
It's a miracle my child and I make it out the door fully clothed each morning, with all the stuff I'm thinking about.
I've been told I wear my heart on my sleeve, that I care too deeply and feel too much.
I know, of course, that this is true. But my feelings are what make me who I am. I don't always take criticism or rejection well (fun times on the publishing endeavors, let me tell you!), and I tend to overreact in all kinds of situations--to get too excited or take something too much to heart. To dwell on something I've done wrong or to overanalyze the tiniest details. But this same sensitivity makes me a better mother, a better listener, a better friend. I'd like to hope a better writer.
And my child, my colleagues, and my friends know that the volcanic emotional eruption comes with the territory. They know when to get out of the way and give me my space, or when I just need a hug.
So give nature a break. Sure, she can't make up her mind lately. She's been a bit moody--furious storms, smiling suns, gentle breezes, and God forbid--more snow--she's going through something, maybe, but who among us isn't?
You can't get the rainbows without the rain.
And you CAN make a snow woman on St. Patrick's Day!!
So while I'm not Irish, I do consider myself lucky. More than lucky, actually--blessed. I pray that all of you are blessed as well, and that if, much like Mother Nature, you're struggling to make up your mind about something--that you accept each day for what it's worth--another incredible day in your journey. No matter how far you are from your destination, you are somewhere today. And that's worth celebrating.
Just ask Pat. I doubt she thought she'd be here in March, but here she is.
And that, my friends, is something more than even the luck of the Irish.
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
2014, Week One Play-By-Play
So, Happy New Year everyone!
2014 is here, and for me, it's been pretty awesome. If you're wondering why, check it out:
January 1st--No School. Holiday.
January 2nd--Return to school. Kids were out of their minds with excitement.
January 3rd--No School. Snow storm.
January 4th--No School. Saturday.
January 5th--No School. Sunday.
January 6th--Return to school for a rather smooth-sailing Monday.
January 7th--No School. Excessive... cold.
Anybody notice a recurring theme, here?
Now, I love my students. Truly, I do. But, like many human beings (I'd imagine) if given the choice between working and not working... well, you probably know which one I'd go with.
Which is why 2014 has been EPIC thus far. The first week of the new year has included a ratio of two days of school to five days off, which, I have decided, in all my wisdom, is EXACTLY how we should fix the broken educational system.
*Note--This post, for these next couple of paragraphs, is not intended to be taken seriously. I understand five days off per week would be a nightmare for working parents (And those who don't like their kids... just kidding, just kidding...). I am merely entertaining a fantasy.
Think about it. We spend BILLIONS of dollars on state and nationwide testing, on standardized measures to hold the teachers (rarely the students) accountable. If we took all the money we spent on testing and hired a gajillion more teachers, we could get those class sizes down to, say, eight kids a class. Furthermore, if we closed school five days a week, then it would be easier to keep those children focused on school, as opposed to on everything else they tend to focus on such as:
1) what everyone is wearing
2) what the other kids in the class are currently doing
3) who is going out with whom
4) what is for lunch
5) what is outside
6) what they want to do after school
7) any other issue that happens to cross their minds other than what they should actually be learning.
We could keep them focused because every time we saw a pair of those sixteen eyes glazing over, we could slap a ruler down on the desk and yell, "Hey! Peggy Sue! You only have TWO DAYS to get this right! That's it! If you don't want to end up scooping ice cream for tourists your whole life, you need to get with the program! Do you want to work at Candy Kitchen at age 40?!?!"
Of course, this is a flawed philosophy because no one on the Eastern Shore will ever eat ice cream again. Not after this so-called "Polar Vortex." I'm sure that in states that deal with this kind of cold all the time, they are rolling their eyes in disbelief that we've closed the schools due to a little wind and cold...
But, um, it's nine degrees outside.
With a wind chill below zero. Which, you see, is not something we're used to dealing with in Delaware. Even so, even I have to admit that I was a bit shocked at the school closings. In my tenure as a teacher I've seen us shut our doors (or delay opening them) for just about everything: Snow (even a dusting of it), threat of snow, heavy rain, fog...
But never before cold.
Having said that, I understand how serious the weather conditions are and feel glad to have a day home with my family. I worry about some of the less well-to-do students in our population, and hope that they are staying warm and eating enough today. In all seriousness, I know that some of them most likely are not.
I am spoiled in many ways, and I'd venture to say that perhaps many of you are, too. I have a job. A roof over my head. No concerns about where my next meal is going to come from, or whether or not my family will be warm enough through the winter. I am, compared to many people in our state, our country, and throughout the world, rich beyond measure.
I know this, and I thank God for it everyday. Seriously--did you ever consider: you have WON the birth lottery? To be alive in this country, with all of our freedoms and opportunities, during this time period, with the incredible advancing technology and modern comforts? Whatever your biggest problem at the moment (and I'm not saying you don't have one, because believe me, I know, that the rain rains on everyone without discriminating)... have you ever considered how amazing it is, that you are here, in this particular moment, at this exact time, perhaps even dealing with this specific problem, for a history-altering purpose? That who you are and what you have in front of you were designed to intersect in a way that will impact all eternity?
Think about it.
So I pledge to make my 2014 as meaningful as possible. Not just because I won the birth lottery (or got five days off from work out of the first seven of the new year). But because I believe I'm here, and you're here, and we're all here, for a reason. I no longer believe in accidents or coincidences. I do believe in a sense of humor (see my earlier proposed two day school schedule), but I also believe that it all matters. And I plan to make this year count. Maybe I'll start by extending kindness to someone who seems to have a bit less to be thankful for, at this current moment, than I do. Is that somewhere you could start, too? What can you do to make this year matter?
And on a lighthearted note, 2014... thanks so much for the extra time off. But I'd rather not be teaching in July, so, if there's any way we could calm down with this whole Polar Vortex thing...
That'd be great.
2014 is here, and for me, it's been pretty awesome. If you're wondering why, check it out:
January 1st--No School. Holiday.
January 2nd--Return to school. Kids were out of their minds with excitement.
January 3rd--No School. Snow storm.
January 4th--No School. Saturday.
January 5th--No School. Sunday.
January 6th--Return to school for a rather smooth-sailing Monday.
January 7th--No School. Excessive... cold.
Anybody notice a recurring theme, here?
Now, I love my students. Truly, I do. But, like many human beings (I'd imagine) if given the choice between working and not working... well, you probably know which one I'd go with.
Which is why 2014 has been EPIC thus far. The first week of the new year has included a ratio of two days of school to five days off, which, I have decided, in all my wisdom, is EXACTLY how we should fix the broken educational system.
*Note--This post, for these next couple of paragraphs, is not intended to be taken seriously. I understand five days off per week would be a nightmare for working parents (And those who don't like their kids... just kidding, just kidding...). I am merely entertaining a fantasy.
Think about it. We spend BILLIONS of dollars on state and nationwide testing, on standardized measures to hold the teachers (rarely the students) accountable. If we took all the money we spent on testing and hired a gajillion more teachers, we could get those class sizes down to, say, eight kids a class. Furthermore, if we closed school five days a week, then it would be easier to keep those children focused on school, as opposed to on everything else they tend to focus on such as:
1) what everyone is wearing
2) what the other kids in the class are currently doing
3) who is going out with whom
4) what is for lunch
5) what is outside
6) what they want to do after school
7) any other issue that happens to cross their minds other than what they should actually be learning.
We could keep them focused because every time we saw a pair of those sixteen eyes glazing over, we could slap a ruler down on the desk and yell, "Hey! Peggy Sue! You only have TWO DAYS to get this right! That's it! If you don't want to end up scooping ice cream for tourists your whole life, you need to get with the program! Do you want to work at Candy Kitchen at age 40?!?!"
Of course, this is a flawed philosophy because no one on the Eastern Shore will ever eat ice cream again. Not after this so-called "Polar Vortex." I'm sure that in states that deal with this kind of cold all the time, they are rolling their eyes in disbelief that we've closed the schools due to a little wind and cold...
But, um, it's nine degrees outside.
With a wind chill below zero. Which, you see, is not something we're used to dealing with in Delaware. Even so, even I have to admit that I was a bit shocked at the school closings. In my tenure as a teacher I've seen us shut our doors (or delay opening them) for just about everything: Snow (even a dusting of it), threat of snow, heavy rain, fog...
But never before cold.
Having said that, I understand how serious the weather conditions are and feel glad to have a day home with my family. I worry about some of the less well-to-do students in our population, and hope that they are staying warm and eating enough today. In all seriousness, I know that some of them most likely are not.
I am spoiled in many ways, and I'd venture to say that perhaps many of you are, too. I have a job. A roof over my head. No concerns about where my next meal is going to come from, or whether or not my family will be warm enough through the winter. I am, compared to many people in our state, our country, and throughout the world, rich beyond measure.
I know this, and I thank God for it everyday. Seriously--did you ever consider: you have WON the birth lottery? To be alive in this country, with all of our freedoms and opportunities, during this time period, with the incredible advancing technology and modern comforts? Whatever your biggest problem at the moment (and I'm not saying you don't have one, because believe me, I know, that the rain rains on everyone without discriminating)... have you ever considered how amazing it is, that you are here, in this particular moment, at this exact time, perhaps even dealing with this specific problem, for a history-altering purpose? That who you are and what you have in front of you were designed to intersect in a way that will impact all eternity?
Think about it.
So I pledge to make my 2014 as meaningful as possible. Not just because I won the birth lottery (or got five days off from work out of the first seven of the new year). But because I believe I'm here, and you're here, and we're all here, for a reason. I no longer believe in accidents or coincidences. I do believe in a sense of humor (see my earlier proposed two day school schedule), but I also believe that it all matters. And I plan to make this year count. Maybe I'll start by extending kindness to someone who seems to have a bit less to be thankful for, at this current moment, than I do. Is that somewhere you could start, too? What can you do to make this year matter?
And on a lighthearted note, 2014... thanks so much for the extra time off. But I'd rather not be teaching in July, so, if there's any way we could calm down with this whole Polar Vortex thing...
That'd be great.
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